Archive for March, 2009|Monthly archive page

I met with Toby!

In Entertainment, Humor, Television, The Office, Work on March 31, 2009 at 8:00 am

Toby and Pam The Office

Before I tell you about the day I drew the line with Michael’s inappropriate office talk, let me say that I finally met with my HR rep!

And it was really cool.

I mean, I don’t know if anything will come of it. But Toby did say he would be in our office more regularly (he works in our corporate building).

And he said he might institute a mandatory manager sexual harassment “retraining” to address the problem with Michael without singling him out. I emphasized that none of Michael’s comments made fme feel threatened or harassed. I was just sick of him bragging about dodging something that should be no big deal.

Getting my concerns on record confidentially (oxymoron anyone?) has really helped me feel empowered to talk to Michael about issues I have with him without fear he’ll try to fire me.

Well he might try, but with HR at my back, it’ll be much harder for him. I’ve heard horror stories about staff members who have offended Michael personally.  And they all no longer work with this company.

So when Michael made an oral sex joke to Jan on the phone… I finally felt like I could do something about it.

(to be continued)


What sexual harassment?

In Entertainment, Humor, Television, The Office, Work on March 30, 2009 at 8:00 am
What you looking at, Jim? Maybe YOU should be the one to take the sexual harassment training! Huh? HUH? 


What you looking at, Jim? Maybe YOU should be the one to take the sexual harassment training! Huh? HUH?


I can’t believe I haven’t shared this yet.

So Michael hasn’t taken our company’s sexual harassment training. Not that it offers anything that’s earth-shattering, but still it’s kind of, well, mandatory.

Anyway, the issue isn’t really that he hasn’t taken it. It’s that he brags about not taking it.

Every time the subject comes up.

Like when I had to take the training when I became a new employee at Dunder Mifflin.

“You know I never did have to take that stupid sexual harassment course,” he said. “I don’t know how I got so lucky, but they must have overlooked me somehow.”

I’ve heard this three or four times now. And every time, it’s followed up with him and Andy or Todd Packer or whatever miscreant is nearby having an inappropriate conversation.

Like about the movie Showgirls. Or a TV show that has topless women. Nothing too graphic … but still asking for trouble.

Jim says that’s nothing. He told me before I started here, Michael used to get Playboys delivered here to hide them from Jan. Oh good lord.

Now I’m not a prude. Part of the reason I get along well with my guy friends is they know they can talk around me without censoring themselves or worrying about me getting offended. Heck I even join my in-laws in looking for the bunny hidden on the cover of my father-in-law’s Playboys.

But my boss? After BRAGGING about not getting sexual harrassment training?

I don’t think so.

So I did something about it…

(to be continued)

An ode to last night’s episode

In Entertainment, Humor, Television, The Office, Work on March 27, 2009 at 7:44 am

"So looks like I'm going to be the new boss in town, Halpert."

"So looks like I'm going to be the new boss in town, Halpert."


Jim and I hit a Chinese place for lunch a couple weeks ago.

I got two fortunes in my fortune cookie.

“Oh great,” Jim said before I read them. “Double happiness. That means my fortune will say something terrible, like I’m going to die soon.”

“Nah these things are never bad,” I said.

My fortunes:

1) “You are about to embark on a most delightful journey.”

2)  “You are next in line for promotion.”

Jim’s fortune:

“You should start putting aside your money.”

“Great,” Jim said. “See I told you.”

“So you and Michael are going to get laid off, and I get to take over!” I said, laughing.

Huh. Who knew? And look, Pam did get promoted last night (kind of).

On a side note, I’d never leave my job to go start a company with my company’s Michael Scott. Ever.  

Not that he’d ever have the ambition to do anything like that… but still.

So that’s what it takes to get away from Michael

In Entertainment, Humor, Television, The Office, Work on March 20, 2009 at 9:00 am

Stanley went to lunch last week with one of his clients who is being laid off, meaning he’ll have to work with someone else from that company from now on. He’s been a purchaser with us for a long time and has built a great relationship with Stanley.

Michael has tried to build an equally great relationship with this client, let’s call him Peter, but with slightly lesser results. He has called Peter with special promotions, to request feedback, etc.

But come Christmas, the card that comes from Peter’s company is always sent to Stanley. When talking on the phone, Peter will ask about Stanley’s family and personal life. With Michael, he stays business only. Which is the kind of thing that slowly drives Michael insane.

So when Stanley met with Peter for a goodbye lunch, he made sure to hide it from Michael until it was over or else he knew Michael would try to weasel his way in.

When Michael found out about it later, he grilled Stanley for all the details. Where did they eat? What did he say? Was he angry? It was clear he was totally distraught he could not be there.

So today, on Peter’s second to last day, Michael calls him to wish him luck in his new ventures.

And keeps him on the phone for 45 minutes.

Talking about himself.

He talked about Jan and her sister and his church and his church choir and his brother and and and…

Fun with eavesdropping.

About 25 minutes in, Jim turns to me and holds up a sign that says “But enough about me…”

Gee I wonder why Peter and Michael were never close.

How soon we forget

In Entertainment, Humor, Television, The Office, Work on March 19, 2009 at 9:00 am


Every month we send an update of things going on at our company to our Chinese colleagues — suppliers, affiliate companies, etc.

Each month Michael picks out a few reports to send to them. He used to e-mail them to a translator, who would then forward them on to China.

I told him one day that I could e-mail them to the translator from now on. It takes literally a minute to do, and fits my job description more than Michael’s.

This week, Michael forgot to tell me which reports to send (and I forgot to pester him for them) and it was several days before he remebered, so we were late sending it off.

Unfortunately he remembered on the day I was out sick.

So the logical thing would be for him to take that one minute to send them off himself like he always used to do, right?

I come back to work the next day, and there it is, sitting on my chair, the list of reports he wants me to send to the translator.

Now four days late, instead of three.


Say my name

In Entertainment, Humor, Television, The Office, Work on March 18, 2009 at 9:00 am


The office has been ridiculously quiet the last couple weeks. Everyone seems to be in a seasonal funk with the cold weather that has descended on Scranton. So every noise stands out.

Michael was in his office listening to something with his headphones on. Creed blew his nose, making an awful screeching sound.

Michael took off his headphones and called out to the rest of us. “Did someone just call my name?”

I just kept my head down and tried not to snicker.

A rough month

In Entertainment, Humor, Television, The Office, Work on March 17, 2009 at 4:15 pm
Me picking up some extra hours at my retail job.

Me picking up some extra hours at my retail job.

It’s been a rough month here at Dunder Mifflin, Scranton.

We shut down four branches. Laid off other workers. And we all just found out we’re getting salary cuts soon.

So if my posts are less frequent, it’s because I’m picking up hours at my second job. Or because I’m using my spare time to job hunt.

But it’s not all doom and gloom. I’ve managed to write a few posts that I’ll try to get up ASAP.

Did I mention I finally got a sit-down meeting with Toby?

More on that gem later.